![](https://i0.wp.com/inquirerkitchen.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/anti-vday-party.jpg?fit=1200%2C800)
‘Celebrate your love any day except Feb. 14,’ the late great culinary historian wrote
One of the entertaining essays that Doreen Gamboa Fernandez wrote in her book “Tikim: Essays of Philippine Food and Culture” (Anvil Publishing, 1994) was “Contrary Thoughts for Valentine’s Day.” It summed up my own thoughts about this day of hearts when it’s getting more difficult to write something different yearly. I suppose it must be the same for chefs who have to come up with a new and creative menu every year.
She had me chuckling by the third paragraph. “My advice,” she wrote, “stay home on Valentine’s Day.” Little did she know that, for the first time, staying home is not only advisable, it’s preferred—sometimes required—and that you and your date, one’s partner in life or an intended, may not even eat together.
![](https://inquirerkitchen.com/storage/2021/02/seafood-paella-640x480.jpg)
In the 2010 movie “Valentine’s Day,” a group holds an anti-Valentine celebration yearly at an Indian restaurant. To illustrate their heartbreak that year, they have a heart-shaped piñata, which they beat to break. The candy goodies that fall out are the only good things that come out of that. Members of the group also burn sheets where their problematic love stories are written.
Not as cinematic or even dramatic is my own group of girls that holds its own anti-Valentine party. Some are single and have no boyfriend; some are wives who don’t believe in celebrating that day, to the relief of their husbands, I suppose. But it wasn’t a “pity party,” the phrase borrowed from an NBA coach who refused to celebrate a game loss. We actually regarded it as a time to show off our new cooking and our wine collection.
My taco salad graced the table one year, the taco replaced by crushed Chippy chips. Another year, my pasta puttanesca delighted because of the story behind the Italian specialty. Another wife showed off her potato gratin, creamy and buttery. That was paired with sausages bought by one of the single girls, all of whom can be relied on to buy ready-cooked food, order a big pizza or a delightful cake dessert. Of course, delivery on Valentine’s Day is always delayed and getting to the place is hampered by traffic and no available Grab car.
Hassle and craziness
On reflection, our own party isn’t anti-Valentine because we do take part in the hassle, the craziness of the occasion. Another piece of advice from Doreen: Celebrate your love any day except on Feb. 14.
The wines we served were always memorable and reasonably priced. We started with the bubblies, not too expensive sparkling wines, and moved on to the whites, where our preference was sauvignon blanc and not the oaky chardonnay. The reds were specifically for summer drinking, given our warm weather, even in February, like pinot noir and merlot.
There was one year, however, when the event seemed the proper venue for one of the single girls’ wedding shower.
If we had our usual party this Valentine’s Day, it will be my chance to show off my seafood paella, successful at last because this pandemic has forced me to cook every day.
And I would introduce a local mead, a honey fruit wine made from duhat by Dielle Melomel with a professional looking bottle and packaging. We will toast via Zoom and eat what we were supposed to bring. It won’t be the same but it will continue the tradition.
And we will obey Doreen’s advice to “stay home on Valentine’s Day.” INQ
Email the author at pinoyfood04@yahoo.com
![](https://inquirerkitchen.com/storage/2020/08/Micky-Fenix-COUNTRY-COOKING.jpg)
Micky Fenix discovers local flavors from around the country and writes about them in her weekly column Country Cooking.